The Copywriter Underground

Like anyone invested in their craft, I can only handle so much stupidity before the mental elastic parts with a snap.

And frankly, no writer could be blamed for howling a little after repeated, long-term exposure to the following:

Bad Social Media Copywriting.

This morning I received an email promising me “a chance to win a t-shirt” if I managed to convince the sizable readership of my fly fishing blog to “like” an organization’s Facebook page.

Wow. A “chance” at a t-shirt. That’s real motivation for a top blogger, who invests a great deal of effort creating original content for his readers.

Clearly, the marketers share my pain.

Worse was this email (also aimed at my fly fishing blog), which – to spare you undue suffering – is only reprinted in part:

Hope your doing well. You’re getting this email because you blog about stuff real guys like. And [name withheld to keep their traffic to a minimum] Whiskey is as real as it gets. We’re betting your readers will want to know about damn good whiskey from the most award-winning distillery in the world. We are writing to invite to participate in a contest we call “Blogging for the Buffalo.”

Wow. Possessive fail in word #2, and it scarcely got any better. (Note my restraint with “most award-winning distillery” or the idea that they know what “real” guys like.)

The rest of the email is similarly challenged – as was the landing page (maybe a visit to one of Roberta Rosenberg’s Landing Page makeovers is in order).

Sadly, they caught me at the wrong moment, and this is what they got in return:

Wow. Goose bumps are rippling up and down my naughty bits.

I simply can’t wait to send my hard-earned blog readership to an anonymous, marketing-challenged distillery I’ve never heard of – and absolutely thrilled with the very real prospect of receiving little or nothing in return.

What thoughtful blogger – at least one capable of building a category-leading blog – could say “no” to a once-in-a-lifetime deal like that?

That I’m being asked to do your marketing heavy lifting for you via an error-ridden email only heightens the giddy anticipation; Social Media Experts know nothing screams “authenticity” like repeated grammar errors, caveman-esque syntax, and yes – Excessive Exclamation Syndrome!!

That your landing page continues the parade of errors only assures me that – as your email suggested – it was built by “real guys” (just like me).

Party on, The Trout Underground.

Social media represents a large (and growing) target; the hype is often unconscionable, and the low-bid implementations regularly fall below the just-invented “Laughability Line.”

I once considered launching a “Social Media Hall of Shame” blog highlighting the worst examples of social media buffoonery, but I (thankfully) realized no marketer could long expose himself to that kind of radioactivity without quickly accumulating a lethal dose.

Unfortunately, the trend seems to be accelerating. Unintentionally hilarious spam subject lines used to provide the majority of the amusement, but social media gaffes are quickly displacing it. And as quickly as you delete/glass over/ignore it, more takes its place.

Keep writing (but please, try to do it well), Tom Chandler.